What Was So Attractive
About
My Rear End?
I used to own a very small factory where we
manufactured custom built restaurant furniture. In the spring of 1965 we built the furniture for the big Galley West Restaurant
at Marineland in Palos Verdes, which is just south of Los Angeles.
I told my wife that I wanted her to see it as I was very proud
of the job, and it was a beautiful setting.
Our younger son, Richard, played the French horn, and was going
to Estes Park in Colorado to play in what was called the Blue
Jeans Music Festival (later known as the Colorado Philharmonic) near the
entrance of Rocky Mountain National Park. We decided to go to California
by way of Estes park, the Grand Canyon and Hoover Dam. We dropped
Richard at Estes Park, then proceeded from there. Eventually,
we arrived at Marineland. We had a very enjoyable lunch and my
wife was able to see our work which had a very intricate detail
that we had been able to master from the architect's drawings.
After lunch we started up the Santa Monica Freeway as we were
heading for home. Our car was a gorgeous 1963 Oldsmobile 98. People
used to stop me to tell me how beautiful it was. I was in about
the fourth or fifth lane from the right. Suddenly, all the lanes
to my right came to a stop. I stopped and here came a bedraggled
little pigeon flopping across in front of me. Unfortunately the
truck driver behind me didn't get stopped...Kerwomp.
People in the cars to my right waved to us, the truck driver and
me, to drive over to the right side where we could pull onto the
shoulder. I got out and looked at the damage. I was about to tell
the driver that the damage was minimal and to forget it. Fortunately,
a California State Patrolman came up at just that moment. He insisted
that we trade names, addresses, and names of insurance companies.
The damages were considerable, over $400, which was quite a lot
in 1965. Thank you, Mr. Patrolman. Also, I had a lot of respect
for those California drivers.
About a year later, I was heading south on old Highway 99 with
a layout that I had made for a restaurant in West Olympia. It
was a beautiful day, there was a Strauss waltz on the radio. Everything
was right with the world. At that time, I-5 didn't go all the
away into Seattle. 99 connected to I-5 at Midway. 99, not being
a freeway, I came to a stoplight at south 154th. I stopped for
the signal, but the driver of the semi behind me didn't, again...Kerwomp.
The impact threw my car at the car ahead of me with such force
that it stuffed both the driver and his passenger under the dash
of their car. It totaled my beautiful Oldsmobile. I swear that
when the State Patrolman found that I wasn't wearing a seatbelt,
he was disappointed that I wasn't injured.
My next rear ender was with my next car, a 1968 Buick Electra.
I was southbound on I-5 heading toward the freeway bridge. Suddenly,
all traffic in my lane stopped. I stopped, but the little girl
driving a Chevrolet station wagon didn't...Kerwomp again.
The damage from that accident was barely repaired when I was heading
north on 15th Avenue West. I was approaching the Ballard Bridge
as our factory was in Ballard which is in the northwest section
of Seattle. As I neared the bridge, I heard tires squealing about
four cars behind me. There was a big cloud of dust around that
car. The next thing I knew that car was in the lane to my right.
Good, he's going to make a right turn, and that's the last we
will see of him. Wrong. At the last possible second before he
would have been closed off by a concrete barrier, he pulled in
directly behind me. There was no way that I wanted to have him
behind me. I sped up and passed at least a dozen cars. Just before
the end of the bridge there is an off-ramp to the right. This
leads down to a signal at the bottom where I would turn left to
head for my factory. Naturally, the light was red. As I sat waiting
for the signal to change, I was anxiously watching in the rear
view mirror to see if one of those cars that I had passed would
come down the ramp. No such luck, the car I was trying to avoid
came into sight coming off the bridge. I told myself, "You've
had it". Sure enough the car came down and sure enough...Kerwomp.
In the police car, the little fellow told me that he was going
to reimburse me for the deductible on my insurance out of his
unemployment. After he left, the policeman said that I would never
see him again. I was just as certain that I had seen the last
of him.
About three weeks later a little man came into the office and
asked if I recognized him. In the meantime, he had shaved off
his beard, and I had completely dismissed him from my mind any
way. He told me who he was and gave me $15 on account. He did
this once or twice more. At that point we were quite busy and
could use a sweeper and a "gofer" so I gave him a job
so he could at least earn the balance of his debt. I figured that
even though the little fellow was lacking in judgment, he certainly
had surprising integrity. His duties as "gofer" did
not extend to driving one of our trucks.
Over the intervening 25 of so years I have forgotten the fifth
rear ender. It must have not been as dramatic. All I remember
for sure is that my next rear ender would be my sixth in six years.
My next car was a 69 Chrysler Imperial. I was driving on
I-5 and exited at the 110th street exit, southbound. The route
to the factory required a right turn at the end of the off-ramp.
Naturally, there was a red light at the intersection. After waiting
for the traffic to clear, there were no more cars. Just as I started
to move, another car came speeding through the signal. I stopped
but the big rockery truck behind me didn't...Kerwomp. Fortunately,
he hadn't attained enough speed to do any damage. That was in
the days when a bumper was actually made to preclude damage when
it was hit. This truck was driven by a rockery contractor who
had rebuilt our yard after a tanker truck had overturned, killed
our paper boy and inundated our yard with diesel oil. But that
is another story.
I was extremely fortunate in not being injured in any of these
accidents. There was never an instance of whiplash, which seems
to be so common in rear end accidents. I credit the fact that
in every instance I was in a heavy car. This meant there was a
lot of scrap iron around me. I'm a firm believer in the safety
of being surrounded by a lot of scrap iron.
It is probably needless to say that for many years I spent more
time looking in my rear view mirror than in looking ahead through
my windshield. All these accidents happened between the years
1965 and 1970. There was never one before nor since. I'm rapping
on wood.